i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
