True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize