I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
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i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
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Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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