hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
