Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
