he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
