talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer