Capitaan dildo arrescate!
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
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I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
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He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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