I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
