I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Randomize
