I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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