I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Randomize