Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
