So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
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