i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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