fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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