So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Randomize
