woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
