I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
wrigley field is MILF paradise
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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