Texts From Last Night

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  (432): View more from Texas

  TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!

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  (432): TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!! http://tfl.nu/zkcs
  Replies (47) Good night (5533) Bad night (904)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"

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  (512): Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo" http://tfl.nu/rorc
  Replies (30) Good night (4779) Bad night (631)
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  (310): View more from California

  i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."

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  (310): i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week." http://tfl.nu/whj8
  Replies (86) Good night (20537) Bad night (1604)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.

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  (910): so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch. http://tfl.nu/syjm
  Replies (57) Good night (17128) Bad night (1202)
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  (848): View more from New Jersey

  Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand

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  (848): Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand http://tfl.nu/3des
  Replies (17) Good night (1119) Bad night (5367)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...

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  (320): Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs... http://tfl.nu/sf3t
  Replies (56) Good night (1466) Bad night (4201)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.

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  (815): No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real. http://tfl.nu/57ae
  Replies (5) Good night (787) Bad night (2317)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough

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  (514): btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough http://tfl.nu/7sph
  Replies (1) Good night (2409) Bad night (913)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary

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  (251): 2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary http://tfl.nu/6uuf
  Replies (8) Good night (980) Bad night (1631)
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  (806): View more from Texas

  Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.

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  (806): Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this. http://tfl.nu/yv7f
  Replies (3) Good night (666) Bad night (1841)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.

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  (519): He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier. http://tfl.nu/icz2
  Replies (9) Good night (3693) Bad night (1064)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.

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  (613): you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers. http://tfl.nu/797e
  Replies (3) Good night (1161) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right

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  (610): I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right http://tfl.nu/fw6i
  Replies (2) Good night (523) Bad night (612)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.

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  (516): I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams. http://tfl.nu/a235
  Replies (2) Good night (507) Bad night (291)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.

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  (412): the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants. http://tfl.nu/nmqh
  Replies (3) Good night (640) Bad night (242)

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