I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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