I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
