he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
