what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
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