I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
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