I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
