i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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