I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
