yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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