she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
