Where did you get a picture of my penis
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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