think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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