well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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