her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize