you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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