If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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