I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize