What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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