mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize