This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
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he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
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Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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