please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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