In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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