We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Randomize
