My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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