I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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