Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
