my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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