i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
It was a blind-side dick pic.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
