i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
