the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize