cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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