Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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